Saga Boy: My Life of Blackness and Becoming

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One of my favorite lines in Shakespeare is in Henry V. There’s a new adaptation on Netflix called The King— I don’t know if you like historical dramas, but I love that shit. Anyway, Henry is a wayward kid, the saga boy, here there and everywhere. Then his dad dies, and he becomes king. Now he has to be responsible. And Henry has this great line, that basically means: “They judge me by my younger days, but not what use I’ve made of them.” Saga Boy the book is about my younger days. The album is about the use I’ve made of them, the man I’ve become because of that journey, my healing and my celebration of that. This memoir really leaves me speechless. I think the author perfectly encapsulated life in his memoir, by spending time focusing on the little things of life as a child would. I find that this is the reason it took some time for me to get into this book. All I wanted was a home. For the ground to stop shifting beneath my feet. For something, anything, to stay the same long enough for me to feel rooted- Tony.

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The book starts off with the attention span of a child, reflecting the age and maturity that Antonio Downing was in the period of time he was writing about. Seeing how he uses his position as an author to start slow and paint the picture of what his life was like with his grandmother, and how much it meant to him, it was soothing and realistic. As we see Antonio grow and we see him becoming aware of the importance of his relationship with his grandmother, she passes. Downing’s memoir showcases his love for language that started with the poetry of proverbs and psalms he read in that King James Bible in Trinidad. He grew up speaking Trini slang mixed with the English and French of his country’s colonizers. Today, he continues playing with language through writing and performing rap and hip-hop music.

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A gut wrenching, heartbreaking tale of a boy’s journey to manhood… across time and space. I did find that it took me a little bit to get going with this one. I found it slow to read - for whatever reason - for the first section. He wasn’t alone, exactly. From his devoted grandmother, Miss Excelly, to his Auntie Joan who takes him into her home multiple times, Downing shares a deep bond and love with the family who raised him. Noticeably absent are his mother and father, whom he doesn’t really meet until he’s older and who pop in and out of his life, often bringing chaos with them. In Saga Boy,] Downing deploys spectacular details in describing [his] childhood years, the sights, sounds and violence of that place and time. The prose in those early passages is exalted and melodic. Even as the tremendous care in its crafting seems evident, the words also flow naturally. Downing never seems to press. We see vast and granular marvels through the eyes of a child still capable of awe.” At age eleven, Tony and Junior were taken from Trinidad to Waubigoon, an indigenous community in Northern Ontario. They lived with their Aunt Joan who was a social worker working with the people there. Lamees al Ethari, author of Waiting for the Rain: An Iraqi Memoir and From the Wounded Banks of the TigrisIt’s funny though: most of us think of memory as a record. But I’m sure you know the famous scenario about 10 witnesses of a car accident with 10 different stories. Truth is elusive. An enthralling, deeply personal examination of the search for a home and the long-lasting effects of immigrant cultural dislocation. Speaking of the monarchy—I was surprised by your nuanced take on colonialism in the book, and in this interview. I expected it to be more straightforwardly painful. It’s surreal, feeling the loss of Antonio’s grandmother. Us readers followed along the start of a journey for a Trinidadian child only for it to abruptly pause for relocation. That sudden twist in life is what left me speechless. Downing spends the memoir relaying how each integral moment of his life shifted and shaped the person he has become today. This memoir helped me realize how significant these events can be, how important it is to understand that everyone has their own story.

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Downing’s narration is compelling and disturbing. He writes about longing for a home—a place where he could feel rooted. But the toxic secrets of the past had been passed down instead, and he saw himself becoming what he least wanted to be: a “saga boy,” the Trinidadian term for a “playboy,” just like his father and grandfather.It’s a common idea to many of us, that of starting over — we do it when we move to a new place, start a new school, leave or enter a relationship. But Downing takes these transformations to new levels, mainly because they are forced upon him by a tumultuous family situation that leaves him moving from country to country and trying to heal from childhood traumas with essentially no help. SaGa (サガ?) is a series of science fiction open world role-playing video games produced by Square, now Square Enix. The series originated on the Game Boy in 1989 as the creation of Akitoshi Kawazu. It has since continued, spanning multiple platforms. The series is notable for its emphasis on open world exploration, non-linear branching plots, and occasionally unconventional gameplay. This distinguished the series from most of Square's titles. There are currently nine games in the SaGa series, along with several ports and enhanced remakes. The beginnings of who he could become is hinted at when he writes a 'choon' that is sung by Junior's band. Over time Junior spent increasing amounts of time away from home. Eventually he moved out and became "a space I no longer recognized." Michael escaped the lonely craziness of his homelife by retreating into words and songs. He didn't understand that these were the same things Miss Excelly had needed to survive: "how to read and how to sing." The miracle of Antonio Michael Downing is not that he became a successful professional and artist after all he experienced, but rather that he survived at all.